Home is where the heart is.

For so long I considered myself to be a nomad. I didn't really have a stable home in this world, nor did I really feel like I belonged anywhere in particular, and I was okay with that. Until now.
Now I have this amazing home in North Carolina and I am surrounded by these mind-blowingly amazing people who never cease to send me into a state of wonder. How any group of strangers could be so welcoming and form such an instant family around me completely astonishes me, but it happened.
Everyday I feel so blessed to have my new home, and my substitute family who would cross oceans and move mountains to ensure I was happy.
Like I said, I was happy being nomadic, but I never really knew what I was missing until now.

Procrastination at it's finest.

• Taking my mind of things and filling my blog with rubbish. 
• 
  
• 1. If you’ve ever tried drugs or alcohol, what was your reason for first trying it?
• I don't do drugs, and I don't really think there was a reason for first trying alcohol, it just happened I suppose. 
• 2. Do you think you could ever have an abortion if you unexpectedly turned up pregnant right this second?
  No. 
• 3. If you were far from home and needed to sleep for the night, would you choose to rent a crappy motel room for $60 or sleep in your car for free?
  Depends where I am/who I am with. If it was safe enough to sleep in my car I'd probably do it. 
• 4. Is there a color shirt you’d NEVER wear?
  Pink. 
• 5. Is there a situation where you caved into peer pressure and regretted it?
  Nothing that springs to mind.
• 6. What is your favorite video game console? Why?
  Not my scene. 
• 7. Do you like vanilla candles?
  Is that even a real question? Who doesn't like vanilla candles!
• 8. Have you ever been in a relationship that was going great, and then suddenly something weird happened and you just KNEW it was going to be over soon?
  This perfectly sums up my last relationship. 
• 9. Would you ever bleach your hair platinum blonde?
  Been there, done that. 
• 10. What are your plans for tomorrow?
  North Carolina State Fair, yo!
• 11. What did you have for breakfast?
  Skipped it. 
• 12. Have you had a relationship in 2013 yet?
  Ended a very toxic one. 
• 13. Who last slept in your bed besides you?
  Rita. 
• 14. What time did you wake up today?
  I didn't really sleep last night, but I had a nap from 11 until noon if that counts. 
• 15. How long until your next birthday?
  Just under six months. 
• 16. What was the last movie you watched?
  Man of Steel - Do not waste your time watching this film. 
• 17. If you could see any musician live, front row, who would you choose?
  Bon Iver. 
• 18. When did you last consume something that had peanut butter?
  Last night I had a bite of a Reeses. 
• 19. What’s the last song you heard?
  Currently listening to Threnody - Goldmund. 
• 20. When you say you love someone, do you mean it?
  With all of my heart. 
• 21. Do you plan on sleeping in tomorrow?
  No, I have Italian at 10am. 
• 22. Do you still talk to any of your ex’s?
  Occasionally. 
• 23. As of this minute, what is going through your mind?
  Thinking of a friend, Matthew. 
• 24. Where’s the last place you went?
  I just came home from Miranda and Marrissa's place. 
• 25. Have you held hands with anyone lately?
  Probably. 
• 26. Has anyone let you down recently?
  I recently moved countries, so I wouldn't say people have let me down so much, rather some people haven't kept in touch like I thought they may have. 
• 27. Does it bother you when people try to make you jealous?
  It very rarely works. I'm not the jealous type. 
• 28. Whats the next movie you want to see in theaters?
  Not sure, I don't even know what's coming out. I don't own a tv. 
• 29. Do you have more than $50 in your room?
  Yes.
• 30. Are both of your blood parents still in your life?
  Yes. 
• 31. Were you tired when you woke up this morning?
  Like I said, I didn't sleep.. so yes. 
• 32. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now?
  Oh goodness, no one preferably. 
• 33. When was the last time you went apple picking?
  Never in my life. 
• 34. Do you sometimes wake up in the morning, lay in bed and think about life?
  Daily. 
• 35. Are you happy winter is coming soon?
  Very!
• 36. Do you have drama in your life?
  Not much, just the way I like it. 

Hold on to these memories

I wrote this a while ago, but I feel the need to repost it today.


I have questions for you that I never got a chance to ask:
Do you look like you did back then? Would it make a difference anyway?
Do you think of me, when you least expect it - when you're unwrapping a garden hose or titling your face to the shower or making love to someone else? And can you leave it at that, or do you find yourself compulsively sifting through the memories?
If I had been the one to leave, would you have written your heart out to me?