Always, love.

Today, I eliminated the last point of contact that I held with the person who has been the biggest part of my life for the last two years. A lot of people in my life will roll their eyes and tell me that it is about time I let go of the person who has caused so, so much damage in my life, but I guess they never really got the full story.

I'm not going to pretend that what we had was the very worst thing that happened to me, because the truth is that we were golden, even if it was for a short time. But like everything golden, it eventually begins to fade. We have made so many attempts to salvage what was once there, that I fear we have begun to tarnish the memory of some of the happiest times of my life.

This is one of the hardest things I have ever done, but tonight something changed and I realised that I am stuck when I am with you, and that is my biggest fear. I need to be constantly moving forward. I love you, and I have no doubt that I will always love you, and one day I will probably regret letting you go. But for now, I am trying to be someone I have neglected to be for two years.

I'm on my own now, and I have never felt more alone.
Somehow, I don't think this is a bad thing.