You said you think we are the best thing.

I know this is a long time coming, but I miss you still, it comes and goes in waves, but undoubtedly, I miss you. Another case of me taking things for granted. I miss listening to The XX and snuggling in that mink blanket you had bought us for winter. I remember how excited we were when you moved out so we could have 'sleepovers'. I remember the way we both went so headstrong into this saying we would never develop feelings, and I also remember the very drunken giggling fit we had when we both confessed we had gotten these silly feelings and our how quickly our headstrong approach faded. I miss the way you used to call me bunny and cook dinner for me at 11.30pm because I could never stick to a regular eating pattern. I miss the way you'd squash me with your silly arms when we slept, and how loudly you would snore, but how I needed that sound to fall asleep for so long afterwards. I also miss you holding my knee and the patterns from the street lights when I'd drive us home and the way you used to try to teach me things about the world, but I'd always laugh because you would get so wound up. I remember the way your roommate would always have to direct me through the city because I'd always get lost trying to finding you. That's what I did. I got lost with you and in you. I had no sense of anything, with the exception of being with you. I appreciate the way you have kept me in your life and I apologise for saying nasty things, it is so much easier than saying sad things. Thank you for everything you have done for me, especially of late. I will always let you in, because sometimes I still need you.